You're Deeply committed to your relationship—
and So FRUSTRATED by how hard it feels...
You're IN THE RIGHT PLACE
the SELF LED LOVE LAB
SUMMER of Love edition 2026
You love each other, but conversations spiral, small moments turn into battles, or distance creeps in when you most want closeness.
You are here because you are someone who holds yourself to a high standard — in your work, in your growth, in the life you've built — and you refuse to accept a partnership that doesn't meet that same standard.
You want to feel safe, chosen, desired, respected,
and connected again (both physically and emotionally).
You don’t want to keep parenting your partner, walking on
eggshells, or wondering if things will ever really change.
You’re not looking for someone to blame.
You’re looking for a way to grow up together in love.
You have likely tried to solve this before. You're thoughtful. You've read the books. Perhaps you've done therapy. You understand, intellectually, more about relationships than most people ever will. And still — the same dynamic plays out. The same rupture. The same long, quiet aftermath.
What you're experiencing is not a failure of intelligence or commitment. It is the absence of a precise, embodied map and real-time integration support.
That is what the SELF LED LOVE Lab provides.
FOR WHOM
I CREATED this program specifically for Couples WHO
Are ready to take radical responsibility for their inner world at a whole new level.
Care about their impact — not just their intentions.
Are ready to grow even when that growth asks you to release old defenses, identities, or relational stories you've long held as true.
Value emotional maturity as much as professional success.
Want to model secure, regulated love for their children.
this is NOT a program for people who just want their partner to change... OR are not ready or interested in becoming a leader in their relationships.
Is this a fit?
you're READY
to become partners who can navigate complexity with ease and care.
to change the trajectory of your romantic partnership
to share IFS work with your partner
to heal relational trauma
To recalibrate after Going through a big life transition (moving, having a baby, getting married etc)
which has made pre-existing issues feel like they've got gasoline poured on them
To Proactively Repair breakdowns and transorm them into repeatable breakthroughs together
To feel genuinely close, playful, safe, intimate and vital together again
HEAR IT FROM Past CLIENTS
SOME kind WORDS
“
Working with Bahia has been one of the most impactful investments we’ve made in our marriage. She creates a space that feels deeply safe, honest, and supportive, where both of us felt truly seen and heard. Before working with her, we felt stuck in familiar patterns and recurring arguments, even though we both genuinely wanted things to be better. With her guidance, we learned how to slow down, understand what was really happening beneath the surface, and communicate with more compassion and clarity. She helped us learn to take responsibility without defensiveness and move through conflict in a way that actually brings us closer instead of pushing us apart. Her balance of insight, compassion, and accountability made the work feel both approachable and transformative. We didn’t just gain tools, we experienced real shifts in emotional safety, understanding, and connection. Our communication is stronger, our awareness has deepened, and we feel more like a team again. I’m incredibly grateful for the growth, healing, and clarity that came from this work.
— LAuren & JorgE
“Working with Bahia was just what we needed. We weren’t entirely committed to going to therapy but her approach felt very specific and easy to drop into. Right away things opened up, things we didn’t really know were there. It got us talking more on our own time and started conversations we had desired to save the space for but hadn’t yet.”
— SAM & GOPAL
“If you are ready to reach a depth with your partner that we don't talk about enough, the kind of truly knowing each other that builds intimacy on a soul level, I cannot recommend Bahia enough...this work was so extraordinary and it's hard to describe if you haven't had it firsthand. The support Bahia showed us was more than we have ever found in a couples counselor before and the wisdom & perspective she brought was atypical and far exceeded our expectations. So grateful to Bahia, especially for giving us the gifts of self-compassion, empathy, patience & forgiveness. I cannot recommend highly enough - you will be changed by this work.”
— TANYA
the self led love lab
WHAT exactly will we BE LEARNING?
This is not communication tips.
This is not endless processing.
This is not therapy language used as leverage.
THIS IS:
→Nervous-system informed.
→IFS-integrated.
→Structure-driven.
→High-accountability.
→Developmental.
You're not learning how to argue better.
You're learning how to lead your inner world so your relationship becomes a catalyst for growth rather than a battlefield.
Week 1 Self-Leadership & Radical Responsibility
Real change in a relationship begins with each individual. This week establishes the most essential foundation: the capacity to lead yourself — to take full, undefended ownership of your behavior, your impact, your needs, and your inner world.
Week 2 Mapping & Interrupting Your Conflict Cycle
Every couple has a cycle — a precise choreography of activation and withdrawal that plays out in predictable ways.
This week, we name yours with clarity and compassion. Once you can see the pattern, you are no longer controlled by it.
You can interrupt it before damage occurs.
Week 3 The U-Turn: Self-Attunement as a Way of Life
The U-Turn is a repeatable, elegant practice for meeting yourself during and after moments of activation — understanding what your triggers are actually here to teach you. We pair this with nervous system regulation so you have the capacity to integrate what you discover.
Week 4 Healing Attachment Wounds with IFS
Using the Internal Family Systems model, we work compassionately with the parts of you that developed in response to early wounds — the protectors, the exiles, the strategies that once kept you safe and now keep you separate. You learn to speak for these parts rather than from them.
Week 5 The Art of Repair
Repair is not an apology. It is a skill — and in the hands of two willing partners, it becomes one of the most powerful forces in a relationship. This week you learn to slow conversation down, listen to understand rather than to respond, and structure repair in a way that actually creates change. Resentment stops accumulating. Trust begins to rebuild.
Week 6 Joy, Pleasure & Mutual Investment
Managing conflict is the floor, not the ceiling. This week you move beyond repair and into genuine enjoyment of each other — cultivating playfulness, pleasure, and the kind of mutual investment that makes a relationship feel like a privilege rather than a project. You practice receiving goodness without bracing against it.
Week 7 Shared Vision, Values & Relational Identity
Who are you becoming together? This week you articulate your shared values, the deeper purpose of your relationship, and the north star you will return to in difficult seasons. Partners who know what they stand for together navigate hard moments with remarkable grace.
Week 8 Embodiment & Integration
Transformation that lives only in the mind remains fragile. This week is dedicated to making new patterns embodied and automatic — through practice, reflection, and accountability. What you have built here continues to evolve long after the program concludes.
For the last decade I have been applying this work deeper and deeper into my partnership, friendships and familY.
...and It just gets better and better.
my LOVE story
When I met my husband, I had already done a lot of work on myself.
But we still had a lot to learn together.
Like many couples, we found ourselves caught in painful patterns at times—feeling misunderstood, reactive, disconnected, or unsure how to bridge the gap between us.
Over the years, we've sat across from therapists, worked with coaches, attended workshops together, and continued doing the inner work. We are still a work in progress.... because cultivating harmony in our home life is a top priority—especially amidst all the challenges life will inevitably throw our way.
“
Bahia is an incredible relationship coach. We use the tools we have learned from her on a weekly basis in our connection, in parenting, and in life. Honestly we are taking these tools and using them with our families of origin as well. Life doesn’t give you a map. Finding Bahia, someone who feels like they have a real understanding and set of tools to navigate such a huge part of life is such a priceless gift.
Becca + Greg
HOW IT WORKS
AN intimate + structured container
the SELF LED LOVE Lab
This is a live, 8-week group program — intentionally kept small so that each couple receives real attention, real support, and real accountability.
EACH WEEK INCLUDES
A weekly private podcast episode to focus your attention on what will actually move the needle, and with self-inquiries that will take you to the next level.
Weekly Group Call (Sundays at 3pm EST // 12pm PST).
A live 60 minute session with direct teaching, facilitated discussions + practices
Kickoff Call: Sunday, July 19th
Weekly "office hours" for parts work, Q&A, and hot seat coaching:
Wednesdays at Noon EST // 9am PST
Thursday at 7pm EST // 4pm PST
*these sessions can be attended as a couple or individually by either partner. You can come to as many of these as will support you!
A carefully curated cohort of couples at a similar stage of growth and readiness
A progressive arc that moves from self-awareness through communication, intimacy, and embodiment
The Self Led Love Lab is transformation with structure — held by a trained guide who is stewarding this work both personally and professionally.
About your relationship coach
Bahia Miller
Bahia Miller is a Certified Level 3 Internal Family Systems (IFS) & Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO) Practitioner, Certified Conscious Partnership Coach, and Life Coach. She uses this work to help individuals and couples to connect with and heal their parts – and their hearts.
She began the work of healing her own relational trauma over a decade ago when she was confronted by her inability (and sincere desire) to form a lasting partnership. Her passion is to hold safe and non-judgmental space for brave humans as they do the inner work of creating secure attachment within themselves and then a life (filled with healthy relationships) that they love.
Bahia has been walking this path with women and men since 2015. She brings her compassion, grounded energy, and trust in each person's unique path to the process.
This is a private, application-only container.
You may apply for 2 tiers
two
PARTICIPATION
options
Group calls held on SUNDAYS at 3pm EST/noon PST
ONLY main group calls will be recorded
FOUNDING COHORT
Self led love lab
GROUP IMMERSION
For couples who want the full immersive group experience inside a high-caliber container.
8 live immersive sessions
Full curriculum + integration practices
Community forum
$555
This tier is powerful, contained, and complete.
FOUNDING COHORT
Self led love lab
high-touch immersion
For couples who desire deeper personalization and accelerated transformation.
Includes everything in the Group Immersion
Two private 60 min couples sessions
One 50 min individual sessions per partner (2 total)
$999
This tier is intentionally limited to 4 couples only.
This is the Founding Cohort
of The Self led love lab
Founding couples receive preferred pricing in exchange for thoughtful participation and feedback as we build something exceptional.
*Payment Plans Available upon request*
In case you're wondering...
Frequently Asked Questions
We are hesitant to do this kind of relationship work in a group space...
I really hear this concern, and I don't want to skip over it.
Relationship work is often messy, intimate, and vulnerable. It makes sense that many people would prefer to do this work privately, one-on-one with a practitioner—and sometimes that truly is the best fit.
That said, there are three things I want you to know as you consider whether this program is right for you:
1. Every couple will be carefully vetted.
I will personally ensure that all participants have the maturity, self-awareness, and commitment to create a respectful, supportive environment for everyone involved.
2. You will never be required to share.
You are always in charge of what you disclose. There is no pressure to speak or share personal details before you're ready. Many participants receive tremendous value simply by listening, learning, and witnessing the experiences of others.
3. Group work has a unique ability to heal shame.
We live in a culture where many couples believe they're the only ones struggling. When we hear others speak honestly about their challenges, we begin to realize we're not alone. Shame softens, compassion grows, and healing becomes possible in ways that often can't happen in isolation.
If you have any questions abougt if this is right for you please don't hesitate to email [email protected] OR book a call on my calendar to discuss your concerns.
https://connect.bahiamiller.com/widget/bookings/30minutecallwbahia
Do both partners need to be on all calls?
This program is designed to be a focused journey for your relationship. With that said - I recommend that you try to join as many of the Sunday group calls together live as possible! Especially the first one. When that just isn't possible it is absolutely fine for one partner to join live and the other (or both) to watch the replay.
"Office Hours" calls are a way for you to get direct specific feedback and support on whatever you are moving through. These calls are optional... and again you can join together or individually.
How is this different from traditional couples therapy?
Unlike therapy, which often focuses on analyzing the past or diagnosing problems, this program uses Internal Family Systems (IFS) and Conscious Partnership principles to give you practical, day-to-day tools. The work is highly experiential, focused on skill-building, communication, and repairing patterns at their root—so you leave with lasting shifts, not just temporary fixes.
What's the difference between the group call and "office hours"?
Sunday Group Calls are the main anchor call for each module. It will include a deepening in the weekly content as well as time for you to share about what is coming up around each theme.
Office Hours sessions are direct support calls. This is where you can bring your challenges (individually and as a couple) to recieve mini partswork sessions and hot seat coaching. Everyone who comes to the call will get time to bring forward what they're working with and get my support.
Who do you typically work with?
I work with individuals and couples in committed relationships who are ready to grow. Many of my clients are parents juggling partnership, parenting, and personal evolution. Most have already done some level of healing, therapy, or self-development and are looking for deeper clarity, connection, and emotional intelligence.
My clients want high-quality relationships rooted in safety, honesty, repair, intimacy, and mutual respect. They’re committed to learning the art of repair, upgrading their communication, and strengthening their relationship to Self. I work with people across the U.S., Canada, and Europe who are ready to uplevel their partnership and build something resilient, loving, and aligned.
How much is it?
The investment is $555 for this 8 week program.
Or $999 for the High Touch Immersion which includes additional private calls.
This is special pricing for the inaugural beta group round of this program.
Founding couples receive this preferred pricing in exchange for thoughtful participation and feedback as we build something exceptional.